Not long ago I was looking through stacks of old family photos. I giggled at pictures of my mom and her "groovy" hairstyles, of family vacations with terrible 80's clothes, and annual Santa pics that never fail to be terrible and/or hilarious (other than the overpaid gray haired man that seems to always look best in the picture. Go figure.) It made me remember each place and the fun or drama that occured on that outing, and I realized that no matter what happened in that picture, it didn't change the current relationships today.
Let's talk about that. Let's talk about the drama. The quarrels that for some reason coincide with the family entity. Why? Why do the people we love the most, the people that really are blood-bound to you, why are they the ones that we so commonly find fued with. I mean, it may make for good television, there's a game show that thrives on it, ha. But why? A friend of mine could call me a cotton-headed-ninny-muggins and it hurt, but if a family member calls me the same thing, it cuts even deeper. And after that whack of the family tree branch, how are we supposed to respond? We just wait 10 years and see it in a picture and remember how we got over it? What happens after the picture? How do we truly get over the bumps and bruises caused by the family tree? A bit heavy. Sorry.
Here's my theory to why we feel the need for peace: I blame Full House.
The Tanner family would feud and tattle throughout the entire show, and with the dramatic cue of cheesy instrumentals, an unflattering camera close up, a lap sit, a profound "moral of the story" and group hug later - everything was fine. Darn you Tanner family. Darn you.
Now Rosanne, now THAT is a little more realistic. After every episode (one can manage to choke down that is) you couldn't help but think about what prison those kids were going to end up in in future seasons. Bickering, arguing, the occasional redneck brawl or runaway case, and they just accepted eachother's crap and moved on!
Maybe a hybrid is what we need here. Danny Tanner needed a beer belly and to ignore his kids more, Rosanne needed to hug more, and the cheesy moral should be coupled with a healthy dose of acceptance of crap.
I can't change the thorns on my family tree. I can't grow wings and fly away from my family tree. I am blood-bound to them, for better or worse. Sticks and stones are nothing compared to the words that fly off family limbs sometimes, but wounds heal, and at the end of the day, family is the only thing you can truly count on. That fact is what happens after the picture, what gets you through the leafy pain caused by the people we love the most. That fact is what you have to cling to. Until, after 10 years, you sit in a place of peace remembering the strife you overcame.
Cue cheesy instrumentals. ;)
very interesting.
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