HIS & HERS - a gift from God

Weddings are fun. Showers are too! And inevitably at both you'll receive/see 'his & hers' memorabilia everywhere. That's a neat idea - 'his & hers' - isn't it? To walk into marriage with a defined list of 'this is his' and 'this is hers' is great... or is it? Oh sisters... it is. And this story from my Feasible Fairytale will make you agree...

Once Upon A Time...

My brand new hubby and I moved in to our one bedroom, one bathroom, one closet castle/apartment. It was a lovely apartment. It was sure to accommodate the never-ending-togetherness we just said 'I Do' to - and we were there for each other literally around every corner. Brushing teeth with one sink. Picking out morning wardrobes in one closet. Even sitting and watching tv on the only piece of living room furniture we owned. We were one.

One frightful day (after about 48 hours of that blissful life detailed above), our fairy tale found its first bump. THIS WAS NOT COOL. We were used to living alone. We didn't co-habitate before being wed, so most of what we encountered the first 6 months of marriage was spent asking, 'uh, have you always done that?' We were very used to having our own bathrooms. Our own closets. Even our own tv's when we were bachelors/bachelorettes. This was quite a change.

Our first year of marriage wasn't the most cuddly, inside voice kind of year. It was tough. It was raw reality. Now, not all of it was from the adorable bathroom and closet cuddles we involuntarily faced, we had more than a taste of reality, and pretty much finished the entire carton of it in the first year. But inevitably, the idea of 'his & hers' seemed like much more than a novelty bath towel - it was a necessity.

DISCLAIMER: This has obvious boundaries, and isn't always best or needed for all couples. This is what worked for us, stopped numerous wars, and is done in moderation, not across the board.

We eventually stretched our legs 2 bedroom 2 bathroom apartment - and we suddenly liked each other a whole lot more.

Ladies - boys are gross. They are. And ladies - our hair sheds... a lot. Bathrooms just aren't fun places to talk about - especially when shared. If you're lucky enough to have a master bath with 2 sinks, 2 closets, and even 2 towel racks - well, you're in Heaven and you can stop reading. If your morning routines involve conversations about 'too much hairspray in the air,' 'you didn't flush the toilet again,' 'omg the drain is clogged again' - well - greetings, welcome to living in need of 'his & hers'.

I recently had an in-law stay with us for a few weeks, getting on his feet and preparing to move into our area. I graciously offered him our 2nd bathroom and 3rd bedroom, and though nothing of the impending doom I was about to face moving into my husband's bathroom (yes - we now have 'his & her' bathrooms - one of the joys of no kiddos yet and virtually NO visitors...ever). We scheduled our shower and morning prep to relay each other, as to avoid crowding, and things were good! Until ...

*insert suspenseful 'dun, dun, DUUUNNN' music here* 

I saw it. Facial clippings. IN. THE. SINK. No he didn't. My husband is very handsome. He's a sweetheart. I love him so much. But in an instant - I remembered WHY we don't share a bathroom. Boys are gross.

Things were good for him too! Until ...

*yeah, 'dun, dun, DUUUNNN' again* 

He saw it. Makeup powder on the counter... and now his slacks... and his black dress socks.

Our in-law has gotten settled into his new home and new job now, and the rest of his family has moved here too, and I SPRINTED to 'hers' bathroom the day he moved out. Glory and peace rested on our life once again. He's still gross. And I still shed and spill makeup powder. But when it's done in our own separate places - all is well in the world.

Now, I mention this only because something we saw on TV the other day made this seem blog worthy(er) than the adventure itself. We were watching a show about people hunting for homes, and the wife said very bluntly, "and we need two separate bathrooms - we do not share bathrooms." It struck me like, well, well, look at you too good to share a bathroom with your husband, that's kind of rude - immediately followed by, crap - that's something I will say to a Realtor one day too!

Is this a rude thing? Is this a common thing? Is this a good-for-the-safety-of-everyone matter to others? Do spouses secretly wish they did this, but don't? I'd love to hear your thoughts! ... not that it will change our arrangements ;)